Various thoughts intermingled with a thread of truth…you can decide what’s what.
- Flies know that they’re on borrowed time this season of year in the upper Midwest of the United States. Frosty nights are the Grim Reapers way of killing a lot of pesky bugs without having to spend a lot of coin on Raid Flying Insect Killer. This is problematic for the rest of us as the flies become super aggressive, flying dive bomb missions around a persons head, landing on your food in a last ditch effort to get some grub prior to heading to that “great pile of dog poop in the sky.” I just about knocked myself out cold the other day at work as a particular pesky fly, on a kamikaze mission, tried to fly up my nose as I was talking with a customer. Do you know how hard it is to look cool as you instinctively swipe at a fly that’s hell bent on going up your nose? For me…it’s not so hard, but for the rest of you…practically impossible.
- As my vast and varied readership already knows (all 15 of you…thank you very much!) I work in a drugstore. I’ve done this for over twenty-two years and pretty much have come to terms with the fact that I’ll never be the second baseman for the St Louis Cardinals, head coach of the University of Iowa Men’s basketball program or lead guitarist/drummer for any popular rock group (although I hear that the Brawny paper towel ‘lumberjack’ models contract is up and I might just shoot for that instead as I look killer in a flannel shirt…I do…my wife is all hands when I’m in demin and flannel if you know what I mean! ((wink-wink)). Basically, when you’re in a position this long you come to appreciate the tried and true things that stand the test of time, like…good employees who show up to work come hell or high water (or runny nose, sore throat, headache, whatever). Or a company who provides good health insurance for it’s employees, or friendships that have developed over two decades worth of work, plus a variety of other “non-tangibles” that I won’t go into. As far as these things go, I learned something else about myself this past weekend at the store….I dig 70’s & 80’s soft rock. Our store has the benefit of satellite music piped in for our customers and employees to listen to as they shop and work. We have dozens and dozens of genres to choose from: hard rock, classic rock, new country, country gold, Nashville, bluegrass, grunge, classical, pianos & guitars, kid tunes and so forth. The trouble is finding one that everyone enjoys. I’ve tried to appease folks by playing the 1970’s channel for a few hours, then the 80’s channel for a few hours, then the country station. Whenever I’ve done this, no one is happy. Everyone has their own tastes in music and no matter what the selection happens to be, there’ll be a group of folks who are unhappy. I’ve even tried to play something from the “Varsity” channel (which plays upbeat rock music) but found that Motley Crue’s “Kick start My Heart” probably wasn’t the best music for our elderly customers to be listening to as they make their selection of the best stool softener and laxative for themselves. Fast forward to last week when our manager switched it to the Ambrosia channel. I’ll probably regret writing this…but I like it a lot. It plays hits from the 1970’s & 80’s of soft rock artists. I’ve caught myself whistling or singing to the likes of: Billy Joel, John Denver, Bread, Air Supply, Sugarloaf, The Stampeders, Anne Murray, Barry Manilow, Linda Ronstadt and the like. I grew up listening to these performers on the radio or (gasp) on albums, as that’s what we did in caveman days of yesteryear. If you come to my store you might open up the dairy cooler door to fetch a gallon of 2% and hear me singing Bread’s Guitar Man (I have to be careful not to go off-key too far…makes the milk sour faster). It’s all good and fine until you realize that the music is on a loop and at pretty much the same time tomorrow you’ll likely hear the same song, and after you’ve heard Looking Glass’s “Brandi you’re a fine girl” for the twenty-eighth time in fourteen days you’re ready to parody the song with your own lyrics (I can sing this song too, in a Sammy Davis-ish Jr. way). Good times!
Brandi…You’re a fine girl
What 70’s or 80’s song do you find it hard to not sing along too?
- Let’s switch to college football for a moment. Would the Big 12 conference please invite Boise State to join their conference already? They piss and moan whenever BSU is ranked higher than them in the rankings, stating that if BSU only played in a more competitive conference like theirs they’d have more loses and thusly not as highly ranked. Well now’s your chance, Big 12. Invite the Broncos to the Big 12, and put them in their place. I’d gladly watch a BSU-Texas, BSU-Oklahoma, BSU-(insert other Big 12 team name here) instead of who they’re playing now (Nevada? Eh…I’ll watch the History channel). You need a quality team and they’ve been good at football for some time. Invite ‘em in…those blue-turfed Bronco rascals…and watch the sparks fly!
- Lumberjacks. College football. The Grim Reaper. Anne Murray. I’ve pretty much covered it all for this morning. I have leaves to rake and flies to dodge.