Biden verses Ryan Cage Match…now that’s worth watching

Just a few observations from the Rich Ripley Industries Compound in beautiful eastern Iowa:

  • Why did someone feel the need to have the Vice President and his counterpart debate the other night on TV?  Sure…they’re a “heartbeat away from the Presidency” but they didn’t speak in terms of “what if” the President died…they backed up what their parties wanted them to say.  Case in point…no one interviews the second string quarterback about the big game, do they?  No one wants to hear what the understudy of a famous actor had to say about their role…so why do it?  (The debate preempted my favorite TV show, that’s the only reason that I bring this up).  Two thumbs up for Joe Biden staying up past eight o’clock Central Standard Time for the debate, that’s almost three AM at his age!
  • I’m a sucker for good marketing. If money weren’t an issue I’d own three dozen cars and trucks… I like good marketing that much.  I needed a pair of totally black athletic shoes and found a pair in a catalog.  $85 for a pair of shoes, which is kind of expensive for “tennis shoes” in my opinion, but the shoes, had this blurb attached to them “They’re like an energy drink for your feet!”  I’m a guy that spends around nine hours a day on his feet on a concrete floor (and have been for the past twenty-three years), so the idea that these shoes could possibly reinvigorate my feet was a “deal sealer” for me (I’m wearing them as I write).  Reebok ZigTech’s….great shoes for running up and down basketball courts AND they leave cool impressions on our carpeting. (which wasn’t mentioned in the ad)  Speaking of marketing…I was watching TV the other night when I saw a commercial for erectile dysfunction.  I muted the sound and just watched the commercial and, if I hadn’t known what they were advertising, would have sworn that they were either advertising lawn fertilizer or Chevy trucks with winches (not wenches of the Middle Ages…look it up…it’s funny).  It amazes me just how conservative these commercials are considering how feminine hygiene commercials can go to great length at extolling their products features (as a guy with three daughters ranging in ages from 21-16, and one wife of twenty-four years I feel that I’ve earned enough points to speak, briefly, on this matter).  And I enjoy the disclaimer during the end of E.D. commercials where the announcer says quickly “check with your doctor to make sure that your heart is healthy enough for sex” …as if that’s ever stopped most guys from enjoying some intimacy with their mates!   (If you’re gonna “go”…go with a smile on your face).

And so…if I had the chance to market an E.D. drug I’d use a slightly pudgy middle aged guy with a receding hairline, in a bath robe, walking out into the living room where his wife was sitting watching TV or reading and have him dance in front of her (to her entertainment) to The Miracles “Love Machine”.  That would get the message across of what they’re trying to sell without being too blatant about it…and you’d hear a great song.  That’s how we roll at Ripley Industries…keepin’ it light and fun…like an energy drink for your…feet.


2 thoughts on “Biden verses Ryan Cage Match…now that’s worth watching

  1. “if you’re gonna go, go with a smile on your face!” HA HA HA!

    You know, we have had the TV muted when that stupid ad comes on, the one with the Cowboy getting stuck … whatever. It makes me laugh every time. Or there’s one where they’re quietly reading on the porch and they exchange “the” glance. You’re right though, they are pretty conservatively done.

    On the debate, I was hoping Ryan would say, “You know what Malarkey is? Malarkey’s coming over there and wiping that stupid grin off your face you Jackal!”

    Between that and the Tigers game that night, I barely got any sleep 🙂


    • I was wondering if the Tigers were making your house a “loud” place the last few nights. 🙂

      Whenever I give Connie “the glance” she usually asks…”what’re you lookin’ so coy about?” You’d think she’d know. 😉

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