The consumer affairs hotline here at RIPLEY INDUSTRIES has been a lightning rod for the past 28 days…since its been 29 DAYS since my last post. Sorry minions….not much going on upstairs if you know what I mean. Here’s what I’ve scraped together for this week.
- This past Saturday night I got into a head-butting match with my nightstand. It was a draw, but it drew blood and made a tidy little gouge just below my hairline (I don’t even have bangs to cover it with). I can’t even make up a story like me and the wife were in the throes of passion and I bounced off the bed and hit it then. It was just me bending over to plug in my charger cord for my phone and WHACK!! Stars. I saw plenty of…..stars.
- My co-worker is in charge of posting stuff about our company on Facebook and she’s busier than a one legged man in a butt-kicking contest (that’s busy!!). I’ve offered to help and now have the credentials to post events and such on behalf of our company. My first (and to this point…only) post was about…wait for it….PUMPKINS!! TWENTY-SIX THOUSAND POUNDS OF PUMPKINS!! Which I unloaded myself. With the idea of promoting that fact I took photos and wrote a little joke about pumpkins and VIOLA!! Posted! The day after I posted I was handed the guidelines for our social media posting. Turns out I broke three rules. No ALL CAPS (but I LOVE ALL CAPS). No excessive punctuation (BUT I MAKE POINTS WITH EXCESSIVE EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!) And last but not least….post no “irony”. People do not like irony. Let me be clear….I COMMUNICATE IN IRONY!!! I MAJORED IN IRONY!! So yeah…I didn’t get my creditials yanked…yet….but I’ll need to follow the rules set in place for the good of all. BTW…our customers will be able to vote for our employees who are dressed up for our Halloween Contest via Facebook. Let me just say….this year…I’m IN IT TO WIN IT. Just sayin’ that I’ll rock the whole costume contest in 2015. Take note. Mark your calendars.
- We’re into Year Two of being empty-nesters and we still have Blues Clues and Pocahontas kids dinner plates in our cabinet. We’re keeping them out for daily use….why?
- I’m cautiously approaching a task this morning that will involve tools. I wish that I could say “yeah…I’m gonna pop the hood on my ’73 Chevelle SS and change out the headers on it…blah blah blah then I’m planning on blah blah blah…” all the while sounding capable and mechanically inclined…but that’s just not me. I’m changing out the tonneau cover on my truck. It’ll involve pliers, and a smallish wrench…which I’ll still find a way to gouge myself with somehow…someway. I remember when I was 16 or 17, using a table saw in woodshop class at good old Bennett Community High School…where they let farm kids and the like use dangerous equipment….and I came very close to becoming known as “Lefty” Ripley. Lesson learned….I’m still anxious around “cutty things” rotating at a high speed. BTW…I was working on constructing a nightstand that fateful day in woodshop that I had drawn up using one inch thick walnut. It weighs around seventy pounds (did I mention that its three and a half feet tall?) and I still use it for storage in our garage. If I had banged my head on that on Saturday night I might not be with you today….so count your blessings….cause I know how much that I matter to you all.
- Life’s kinda boring sometimes, ain’t it? You can thank God Himself for that. I see all of those refugee’s flooding Europe from their war-torn homes and I think to myself “God help them”. I see parents carrying their little ones. Folks desperate for answers. Desperate for shelter. Desperate for food, warmth and justice. It makes me worry….worry for them, worry for us….that we’ve grown jaded and perhaps callous to the plight of those across the ocean from us…and even in our own communities. While I work in an environment where I see folks casually manipulate our food stamp programs to fit their needs I see others fall through the cracks and go without. Its troubling for someone who has Matthew 25 verse 35-40 engrained into my heart. What I’ve chosen to do is buy items not normally covered by food stamps and to donate those items to places like the women’s and children’s shelter in my town, or to a mission that operates in a poor neighborhood. Items like toilet paper, shampoo, toothpaste, toothbrushes, feminine hygiene and laundry detergent. Or sometimes I’ll donate food and clothes….those places are just happy to get the help. I walk away wondering if I could do more. I bet that I could.
Have a great and blessed week my friends,